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coalescentIt's done. I'm home.
Well, 'home'. At this point, Oxford feels more like home, to be honest; the past four years have been, pretty much, non-stop great. And yet...as much as I wanted to stay in Oxford, part of me wanted to leave. It comes down to the old saw about university being as much a time as it is a place - even if I did hang around, it wouldn't be the same. Sure, I know plenty of people that are hanging around, or who live in Oxford. Tom's got his job at the IMM, then a DPhil; Lyndsey and Angharad are doing DPhils straight off, Rachel's coming back to do a PGC, and Ian and Ruth and Jo and Alx aren't going anywhere in the forseeable future (as far as I know). Mike may be disappearing to Russia for a year, but he'll be back after that. But even staying in Oxford, I'd have to find a job, and I'd be detached from the university rather than a part of it, and a lot of people I know would be gone.
All of which meant my feelings as I finally packed up and left the house were decidedly mixed. Sadness, happiness, trepidation, excitement, all of that. In some ways, that's really dumb, because it's not even as though I'm going to be gone all that long at first - what with trips back for Tanaqui's Ghibli, the library sorting, Caption, and probably even next year's fresher's fair. I doubt the reality of the situation will really sink in until sometime in the autumn.
Presumably at some point I'll find a job, although I can't find it in myself to be hugely motivated right now. Partly that's because I don't have a clear idea of what I want to do, only some vague outlines; and partly it's just because I'm in no hurry to commit myself to something that's going to take up that much of my time! I've got Farscape DVDs to watch, you know...
The move itself was tiring, especially in the heat. It took three car loads (three cheers for parents who are (a) prepared to let me cart around that much stuff, and (b) willing to help me move it all). My (home) room is now jam-packed with boxes and books, clothes, videos, DVDs, folders and files, and everything else I'd accumulated over the year. God knows how long it's going to take to sort it all out.
Well, 'home'. At this point, Oxford feels more like home, to be honest; the past four years have been, pretty much, non-stop great. And yet...as much as I wanted to stay in Oxford, part of me wanted to leave. It comes down to the old saw about university being as much a time as it is a place - even if I did hang around, it wouldn't be the same. Sure, I know plenty of people that are hanging around, or who live in Oxford. Tom's got his job at the IMM, then a DPhil; Lyndsey and Angharad are doing DPhils straight off, Rachel's coming back to do a PGC, and Ian and Ruth and Jo and Alx aren't going anywhere in the forseeable future (as far as I know). Mike may be disappearing to Russia for a year, but he'll be back after that. But even staying in Oxford, I'd have to find a job, and I'd be detached from the university rather than a part of it, and a lot of people I know would be gone.
All of which meant my feelings as I finally packed up and left the house were decidedly mixed. Sadness, happiness, trepidation, excitement, all of that. In some ways, that's really dumb, because it's not even as though I'm going to be gone all that long at first - what with trips back for Tanaqui's Ghibli, the library sorting, Caption, and probably even next year's fresher's fair. I doubt the reality of the situation will really sink in until sometime in the autumn.
Presumably at some point I'll find a job, although I can't find it in myself to be hugely motivated right now. Partly that's because I don't have a clear idea of what I want to do, only some vague outlines; and partly it's just because I'm in no hurry to commit myself to something that's going to take up that much of my time! I've got Farscape DVDs to watch, you know...
The move itself was tiring, especially in the heat. It took three car loads (three cheers for parents who are (a) prepared to let me cart around that much stuff, and (b) willing to help me move it all). My (home) room is now jam-packed with boxes and books, clothes, videos, DVDs, folders and files, and everything else I'd accumulated over the year. God knows how long it's going to take to sort it all out.
